Today was Rough

…For me. Peter was great.

I cried over every little detail. I had to move the carseat from my mom’s car to our car. I realized while putting it in that I ALWAYS have trouble putting it our car and Jacob always finishes it for me. So this morning when the weather is cold, I’m struggling with the carseat while Peter screams in fun terror when the kitties come closer to him. He climbs inside the car (it’s a small two door), and promptly loses his balance and falls out backwards. Thankfully he fell on his bottom and he said it was scared and not hurt.

But I was traumatized. Seriously. So I’m struggling, Peter’s playing when the kittens, and I realize: This is my reality. While I know it’s not forever or even a full year. It’s a long time. I ended up putting the carseat on the side, instead of the middle. The side I can do fine, for some reason it’s the middle that screws me up.

It’s fine, Peter’s fine, and I’m crying.

I decide to go to Subway and treat myself to a healthy lunch. We go in and order without problems, Peter wants to stay and eat but we are going over to a friend’s house. Fine. He rolls with the punches. On the way out I see an old friend (this is my Hometown, after all). She asks how I’m doing and I smile and say, “Fine. Today has been tear free” pointing at Peter. She looks at me weird and I realized that she doesn’t know that Jacob left for Basic. I tell her and then she asks, “Oh. How are things going?” I BURST into tears. I hate crying in public. I stutter out, “I guess I can’t talk about it.” She nods and holding Peter’s hand I walk to the car.

(Also my glasses, which were on the last leg, broke. I’m squinty and have a vague headache from it.)

Earlier today Peter asked, “Where’s Daddy?” I was able to say, “Remember, Daddy got on the airplane and is learning how to fix the airplanes. He’s not going to be home for a long time, but he’s safe.” He nods his head, “Okay.”

And that’s it. It’s that simple for him today.

Sometimes I have to image myself laying in God’s hands (like a bed), I see Jesus as my blanket, the Holy Spirit giving me a breeze (warm or cool). I pretend the Blessed Mother is stroking my hair like my Momma does when I was little and sick. I just have to remember God knows what I’m going to go through. God opened this path for us to Trust in him to follow.

I’m following God today and it was hard. I offer up my suffering in union with the Suffering of Jesus on the Cross.

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Tot School drop out?

Ideally. Ideally.

Ideally, I would like to be able to have Tot School from 3-5 days a week and for 1-3 hours per session. However, life is moving really fast right now and I know that this is just an extra. It’s the thing in our life that can give without any discord.

He loves the school we do together and I will be keeping some of the activities that we have done.

Things that are staying:

Sensory Tub ~He loves this and so do I

Themed Books ~I’m still going to check out a bunch of books at the beginning of the month and put them through a rotation and read with him

Tot Trays ~These are activities that I have already have planned and have resources for, so we are going to just do these on days we are just staying home (no appointments, work, or deadlines)

Things that are leaving:

File Folder games ~We can use these in future years, so I don’t feel bad for making some now

Worksheets ~I wasn’t able to keep up and it felt like a chore

Schedule ~I’m fine doing school activities when the mood strikes us or Peter asks for them
And this is how Peter became a Tot School drop out, but don’t worry. He’ll be back.

Menu Plan Monday

This week is a little crazy. Actually most weeks are. Jacob and I are going to a Homeschooling Conference an hour away and his Mom (or sister) is going to come down and watch Peter and the dog. Also our wedding anniversary is TOMORROW, so we may be eating out.

Monday: Grilled Hamburgers and Grilled Corn on the Cob

Tuesday: Out to eat (hopefully ;))

Wednesday: Honey-Mustard BBQ Pork Ribs

Thursday: Bacon Tenderloins

Friday: Grilled Cheese and fruit salad

Saturday: Lunchmeat sandwiches

Sunday: Homemade Chicken Pot Pie

We will be eating Pancakes, Eggs, and Cereal for breakfast, and Lunch will be Quesadillas and Homemade Lunchables.

I hope to make a tab to put the recipes up. They are delicious. What are you having to eat this week?